Part One: We Don’t Hate You,
We Just Don’t Understand What You Are Thinking Of Us
Another sunny day in Gaza, another
ride along the beckoning Mediterranean, another trip where the smell of raw
sewerage permeates the car for miles. We
are heading to El Wafa Rehabilitation Hospital. El Wafa means kindness or
truthfulness, and by the end of the morning I wonder if there may actually be an
undescribed Palestinian affliction: too much goodness.
We meet with Dr. Basman Alashi,
engineer, manager and now an extraordinary hospital director and Dr. Ayman
Badr, rehabilitation doctor and medical director who received a BA in Rumania,
a masters in Cairo, and who has finished his clinical exams for medical school
but has been unable to finish his thesis as he has been trapped in Gaza without
a permit. Moussa Abu Mostafa, a PhD student in occupational therapy, head of
the rehabilitation team, joins us as well.
Dr. Basman, speaks with a formal
sincerity and heartfelt openness; he begins by talking about the facility here,
the hospital, lab, physiotherapy, occupational therapy, an elder section where
folks with no family supports and the need for 24 hour medical care can live
out their days at no charge. There is an outreach program to homes in Rafah and
Khan Yunis, There are plans to open up other sites in other areas of Gaza. 90%
of the wounded are “needy, poor, cannot afford a shekel for a taxi, so they
stay at home, they have pride and they are not going to ask [for help], so we
ask them if it is okay to ask what they need.”
But I want to know more about the
war; El Wafa Hospital was repeatedly attacked and ultimately leveled. For me this is unimaginable, I am trying to
wrap my brain around bombing a rehabilitation hospital. We look at photos
before and after: an extensive modern medical facility reduced to a massive
pile of rubble. Dr. Basman explains that “in the days before the war, they felt
something was going to happen, there was tension in the building, so they prepared
an emergency plan for each patient. Do they need to stay with us or can we
train their families, so a few chose to go home, seventeen cannot leave, and
then the war started.”
The first day or two were okay. “Day three we were hit by
artillery. [This is said calmly but this is a mind boggling concept, the
Israelis are bombing a rehabilitation hospital, does this bother anyone out
there in international justice land?]. “The hospital stood one kilometer from the
border on vacant land. We were hit in
the middle of the night, no warning, just a direct hit to the hospital, to the
fourth floor. We had men on that floor
but we moved them to the first floor for safety, so we had no injuries. We
thought it was a mistake. Israelis know it is a hospital. It is clearly marked.”
“We just went through our daily activity as nothing
happened, afternoon day three, another hit, larger than first four; at that
time we went to Shifa Hospital for press release, talked in Arabic, English,
French, Spanish, German, telling the world, this is unacceptable, we are
connected under Geneva Convention, and so forth. Eight volunteers stayed with
us as human shield. At night, I drove them to the hospital under fire; they
gave me an ambulance, I gave them free access inside the hospital so they can
report any activities showing to the world what kind of patients we treat,
unconscious, cannot move, cannot feel, some of them sleeping for year or three,
coma for ten days.”
“But we continued to use the media to express our concern
that Israeli must not target the hospital. I asked Israelis if there is any
evidence [of militant activity in the hospital]? The army released classified pictures saying
this is El Wafa Hospital and a red dot saying this is launching missile. We looked at the “hospital”, this is not the
hospital, this is three to five kilometers away from us. [FYI, according to
international law, it is never okay to bomb a hospital]. We made another press release, showed
evidence, showed how buildings are totally different so Israelis are misled.”
“But Israeli continued asking the hospital and the area to
evacuate. On 17th July, 9 pm
we received a call, pretended to speak Arabic but Hebrew accent, asked us to
evacuate the hospital. We took it as a normal
call because all of Shejaria received such a call. Five minutes later, a robo
call to evacuate, five minutes later a call from Israeli army, you need to
evacuate; we will start targeting the hospital in ten minutes.”
Five minutes later, bombing from artillery, the air, we lost
power, no electricity, the 8,000 square meter hospital went dark. We cannot see
our hands, we had patients that need oxygen, breath through a tube. At that
time we decided to evacuate for the safety of patients and staff, ambulances
were scarce. So we moved them in regular
cars, two to four per car, carrying them in bed sheets, just under fire and we
are moving and ask everyone around the hospital to move these helpless patients
that they do not even know what is going on.”
“We were able to move them safely. The Red Cross, Gail, called saying I have
special message from Israeli army, how much time do you need to evacuate the
hospital? I asked the management and doctors, they said we are waiting for a
special equipped ambulance to carry four patients, with oxygen. I called her
and said I need two hours. She said, okay, I will convey the message to the
army. Fifteen minutes later she called
back. The bombing continuing at the hospital
while she is talking to them, chaos and darkness. We lose our sense of direction. What should
we do if not trained to dodge bomb? She
called me back, I have another special message from highest authority from
Israeli army. They will not target the
hospital. But the demand was not fast
enough to get to the lower command. I was emotionally upset, it is too late.
She said I am just a messenger. I told her she should say do not target the
hospital. Which side are you on? Israelis know exactly who we are.”
“On March 17, we moved to a maternity clinic, Sahaba Clinic
in the middle of Gaza City, and moved from 8,000 square meters, to 800 square
meters. We were not able to take any equipment and medicine, just running to
save our lives and our patients’ lives.
With the help of God we evacuated safely. The next day we need medicine, clothes,
bumpers, sheets, etc. At that time I went to the hospital which was a war zone
at 10 am to look. The damage and fire
was still on, severe damage to every floor. We could stay no more than 30 minutes,
drones flying over us, bombs everywhere.
We felt safety is our main concern so we left. We were able to take some
medications, enough for one to two days.
We left the area without anything else.”
“On March 18 we called the Red Cross to arrange escort to the
hospital to protect us and not to be targeted. Israelis target ambulances. The Red Cross
refused because the Israelis refused to give them safety, so we stood without
any equipment, without any medicine or machines that better the lives, a 30 year
investment. We extend our hands to local and international organizations. Many supported us, brought us beds, sheets,
water, food, medicines, free, so we started from zero building up the hospital.
We took care of patients as day care, also received new patients, wounded,
surgery done [elsewhere] and they need rehabilitation. We are the only comprehensive completed medical
rehabilitation hospital in Gaza City.
There is few that does similar services, not as comprehensive as
ours. We receive patients from the Ministry
of Health.”
“The war ended on August 23rd, the building we
are in now belong to El Wafa Hospital but it is far away from the
original. We were planning to move the hospital
to Gaza City and this building was planned for elderly home. This building was
donated by a Palestinian doctor, el Alami, the land given by the government, so
once the war ended we moved all our patients to here, at Zahar City. We shared
with elderly care home, now half hospital, half elderly care center.”
“We start as a team rebuilding the hospital, equipment, medicine,
19 clinics from the hospital were destroyed. Here we are now 225 days later, we
are back in business, not of choice. Gaza needs our services due to blockade,
continue preventing Palestinians go outside to get medical help. This puts us
in a harder position, despite we have no budget or resources, we must continue
our services even if only with our hands and comfort them with our feelings and
they continue to improve their life. The
world saw us through the eyes of cameras and many organizations support us…UNDP
approved us to enhance, extend this building another floor so we can
accommodate more patients. WHO, UNRWA,
UNDP, Interpal, Australian charity care, Malaysian came to our aid. I am not
saying we are proud of what we are doing.
The specialties that we carry, none similar in Gaza. People used to pay thousands of dollars in
Egypt or Israel, but since El Wafa was here, they came to us for minimum
charge. El Wafa is specialty, unique in
service, in equipment, no one is similar to its equipment.”
“Everything we will see is donated even the food, tubes,
needles. Who supports the hospital is Palestinian people, no other continuous
income, especially Muslims, part of being a Muslim is helping the poor. 10% of donations go to management, this is
low. The staff put in tremendous
efforts, as a team and this is how we work, a tremendous effort to bring back
the hospital. 20% of the staff lost their
homes, many lived close to the hospital or Shejaria, close to the border. Our staff during the war, they were at the
hospital 48 to 72 hours a time, leaving their families. This is my duty, the
others who are not direct services they stayed home. Once we came here, all
came back. We lost two staff at home. One
was walking in the street, a man with three daughters, he stopped by the grocery
store, bought figs. He was targeted by a
drone walking alone; Israeli did not distinguish from woman, man, child,
resistance, young, or old. [The other
staff] her home was destroyed, she went to the UNRWA school [for shelter] and
it was targeted. She was hit by shrapnel in her head, her brain was out, she
was 21 years old, unmarried.”
“Our concern was how to serve patients, we all risked our
life just to continue. We had one lady with cancer in her spinal cord, no sensation
in lower part of body. If a bomb hit
her, she would not feel her body frying.
We cannot leave such patient, we cannot live with ourselves, feeling that
we left a person who was breathing. As Muslims, serving patients is first,
serving us is second.”
“Many patients cannot come this far in our new facility,
outpatient services too far, no transport, so we have to go to them and it
costs. Only in Rafah and Khan Yunis, the areas really devastated, some of them
do not understand the extent of their injuries, very poor, they may not know
how to treat them. Need to rehabilitate the soul itself, teach the wife and the
family, show him the love. This is 50% of recovery. We have one patient on chronic ventilators. Now
he is child, 10 years old, he was injured with his family, missile in cervical
spine, C2 quadriplegia. He lost his father,
brother, uncle, girl twin, and four cousins.
His mother was pregnant, they were farming, bombed from a drone. Whenever Israelis see a group, sitting in the
farm, they were just eating, drone targeted them.”
“[Another patient is] two years old, father was killed, mother
was injured, he is in coma, not on a ventilator. He has a deep brain injury, he is at home now. He was moved to another house, their house was
destroyed, we were following them; he has gastronomy tube.”
“The new building is U shaped, the right side is the hospital,
the left side is the elderly, the middle is management, so all separate. We still have a problem that our space is too
small, so children and adults are mixed. We had 17,000 square meters before and
a garden, this facility is 4,800 square meters.” The old hospital was very high tech with a
high level of care and included a gym, swimming pool, hyperbaric oxygen
treatment, video conferencing. “We lost
a lot. It is difficult that we lost all
this but we are all optimists and we look at the positive side of any events,
because we are rehabilitation, anything we face, we look at the positive side
of it. The hospital destroyed completely on the 23rd, thanks God we
are all safe. We sent a message: we don’t hate you, we just don’t understand
what you are thinking of us. We are just
human beings like anything else, we live on planet earth; we all look
alike. The Israeli response was the hospital
was a terror site, like all other bombings, they justify everything.”
We ask if there have been an independent investigations. “Officially
no, but media did extended investigation, eight independent foreigners with
full access to the hospital, they have not reported anything. There is no
justification to target children, hospitals, [he lists all the buildings
targeted]. The only thing is to terrorize people to leave. So then the young
boys out of school and working, the girl married too young, it is circle of
devastation. If I don’t give the father
a chance to work, that means a problem in the family, but Gaza still survive. If Israeli came to the hospital for treatment,
my glasses looking to him as a human being and to treat.”
“Some departments like urodynamics, diabetic food center,
hyperbaric center, the only one in Gaza, are not up and running, patients are
waiting. The hyperbaric, limbs were saved,
five year old wounds were healed; we cannot get another one. I cannot plan
where I will be in two hours.” He says
that it is harder now to find donors.
The Islamic Bank in Saudi Arabia four months ago offered four million
dollars if the Israelis will agree not to target the hospital and Gaza will
remain stable, so no donation. Larger organizations and governments are not
donating, but individuals still donate who “believe in cause of Palestine.
There are also financial restrictions on wire transfer, so bank calls, we have
a wire, we need a contract, where it is coming from, what it is for. We need to show purpose, restrictions from
banks outside of Gaza, it has to go to a certain group that is not labeled as a
‘terrorist.’ We see this as a challenge, we don’t have a choice, succeed or
just die, we will continue.”
“Another part of the tragedy, of the siege: killing the
victim is part of the crime but also forbidding the victim to say we are
victims and are human beings. This is a
human feeling.” This is the other face of the crime.
The tour of the hospital
starts with an ambulance that was targeted by a drone filled with nails, we see
the entry holes in the back door and the exit holes in the front, (dear IDF
soldiers, why would you send a drone attack to the back of an ambulance???);
they have not been able to replace the fractured glass so the windows are
covered with cardboard sheets.
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| Ambulance targeted by drone during Israeli attack, summer 2014 |
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The first floor has a
large room for physical therapy equipment; the area is clean and orderly. The nursing stations and patient rooms are
improvised but functional; Dr. Basman knows every patient and his or her story. He greets the conscious patients warmly,
there is a lot of joking around, moments of tenderness, a profound sense of
caring. The windows are open, a fresh
breeze blows through the rooms, there is no antiseptic smell, families cluster
around beds. The most tragic patients
are in various chronic states of unconsciousness and physical constriction from
a variety of causes, motor vehicle accidents, cardiac arrest during labor
probably due to a difficult intubation and an urgent C section, brain tumor. But the patient who will always stay with me
is the little boy, Hamad al Reify, with the high level spinal cord injury and
quadriplegia.
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When the electricity goes out, he has 30 minutes on his
battery run ventilator. They have no cardiac and respiratory monitors so nurses
sit near his bed monitoring him with their eyes and their hands. He has a
tracheostomy, but is able to communicate and has an unbearably winning
smile. He jokes, he dreams, he was given
some toys, but he sent them home for his sister. The staff clearly love him. Some IT type person has designed a mechanism
that fits under his chin and allows him to change the channels on the TV. Later we see him in a reclining type
wheelchair, basking in the sun. If he is lucky, he will spend his life at El
Wafa. The staff has not received a salary in the past six months.
Dr. Basman ends with a message to the world. “Gaza is
fine. What you see from the outside, it
looks devastated. But if you live among
the Gazans, you won’t leave. I choose not to return to America [where he lived
for a number of years]. We are human. I
am born here. You don’t have a choice
where you will be born, but I have a choice for whom I am.”
Too much goodness.
Part Two: Here Death, There Death, But Let Me Do Something Useful For People
The Wefaq Society for Women and Child Care founded
in 2010, seeks to achieve gender equality and improvement for vulnerable
children through economic empowerment and psychosocial support in one of the
most challenged areas of the Gaza Strip.
We meet with the leadership and women involved with the organization
over coffee as the electricity flickers off (there is no fuel for a generator)
and the stories emerge in a warm, open, sisterly environment. (Consider that it
is extremely hard for the staff to work when there are no functioning computers
let alone functioning civil government.) The situation in the southern Gaza
Strip is more difficult and more miserable than many areas, but largely ignored
by the media, far from Gaza City. The
society has its roots in the Gaza Community Mental Health Program but we are
told that Dr. Eyad el Saraj, (founder of GCMHP and for years the only
psychiatrist in the Strip), urged them to be independent; they now have a
department for women, children, building capacity, and media. Another branch in the al-Shoka area, the most
marginalized part of Rafah, offers psychosocial support in partnership with
ActionAid Palestine, funded by Disaster Emergency Committee-DEC.
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“We are
here also implementing our project which is psychosocial empowerment,
improvement for women and livelihood, a fund for small projects for women who
have been bombed and domestic violence, and widows, divorced, and abandoned.
Some of the women lost their livelihood during the war, left their sheep and
goats and escaped to the center of Rafah during the war. Black Week started on
Friday; they [Israeli forces] were trying to occupy the east area [of the Gaza
Strip], they destroyed everything, animals, trees and more but the media
doesn’t reflect the picture. Bombing and destruction followed us to the sea
shore by F16s. After [the people] leave
the area they try to come back during a cease fire, but they were bombed during
the cease fire, intentionally. Many died, injured, houses destroyed, they went
to UNRWA shelters or to relatives. They
found after the cease fire, their sheeps and goats were dead, the only hospital
in Rafah, Abu Youssef al-Najjar Hospital was bombed, (see: http://www.maannews.com/eng/ViewDetails.aspx?id=717391),
the injured couldn’t reach, it was the center of occupation. The hospital was bombed, so they died, so
more casualties. This aggression to the hospital made big problem, bodies in
the field, in the street. To treat the
injuries, they moved the injured to a private Kuwaiti Hospital, very small and
very limited, no equipments. The main
hospital was closed, surrounded by soldiers.”
“The center has an emergency response plan, so once the war
ended, Wefaq quickly responded in shelters, psychosocial program, intervention
with people. The staff went to the
shelters, bring donors clothes, food, distribute them. We are one of the members of the DEC
emergency committee in community based organizations, (CBO) with UNRWA. They formulated an emergency committee and
started to respond, especially in the shelters and relatives’ houses.”
“People who are forced to leave especially in the eastern
area were without anything, clothes, food, money, nothing; they escaped with
nothing. Then it happened during the cease fire! [Israelis] attacked, there is
no safe place in Rafah at that moment. I
was at home waiting for bombs. I live next to al-Shoka, my neighbor’s house was
hit with a very big rocket; didn’t explode.
The civil defense removed the rocket, many cases like this.” The women are laughing, gallows humor. “All
Gaza like this.”
Another woman explains, “I was leaving my children home in
Khan Yunis to bring help and needs for people in shelters. My children say to
me, ‘Mom we are afraid, why should you leave us?’ I say, ‘Here death, there death, but let me
do something useful for people.’ I was
crossing Al Nasser Street while bombing happened ten meters away, another time
in Khan Yunis, less than ten meters and the house, they bombed.” I ask, what
about fear? “We are used to it, also it was Ramadan. I have three kids, two in university, one in
school. We are as adults, we are fearful, a frightening experience.” So Gazans
are experiencing a terrifying unpredictable bombardment and they are fasting for
Ramadan.
Another woman adds, “I was waiting for morning to begin. At
night you don’t know when the bombing will begin. Because of the psychosocial pressure, all
categories [of people are] nervous. So violence start to be in every category,
not just against female, many incidents in shelters because of the distress of
the people.” (Think New Orleans,
Katrina) “Immoral males make it for them, the same for war or not with war, in
harassment, sexual threats. The shelter has two to three WCs, how the female
teenager can go to the WC? They didn’t have water to wash, they tried to get to
relatives’ houses to shower. Women
delivered in the shelters, no medical care, there is no nurses or doctors. There is no professional equipment. Female
doctors were refusing to come to the shelters because they were saying, ‘My
children, how could I leave my children?’”
“A mother delivered [in the shelter] but she hadn’t any
clothes for baby or for her, so they hired for her the near houses to get some
clothes, hygiene was very miserable, UNRWA services were not as proper as they
should be. Three days in Ramadan, UNRWA
had no food in shelters, director of UNRWA said he has nothing in Rafah, and
probably beyond. The emergency response
of them was to go to restaurants to get food for people. They (the volunteers
and NGOs) opened the restaurants even in Ramadan to cook the food. We are
trying to get better the situation. We don’t like to talk about war, opens too
many wounds, everyone is hurt. Whatever
you saw on TV it is an instant, not as much as actual situation. The Syam
family, they bombed their house. They
escaped to the street but there is no place secure, thirteen killed in the
street by bomb, plus injured; random killing of entire family, kids babies,
many innocent families.”
At this point, the women are crying, the women in charge
and the women being served share the same experiences, the same pain, the same
tears.
Everyone reconstitutes their fragile psyches and the
interview continues. “Projects here in
our branch: we are implementing in cooperation with UNDP, the legal protection
for victims of war after the aggression on Gaza for female victims. We didn’t talk about the other section of the
project in al-Shoka, we are implementing psychosocial improvement and
livelihood training. [We focus on areas like] gender based violence, IT, young
women leadership program for university graduates to prepare them for job
opportunities, CBOs, (community based organizations), private sectors. We also had already finished two months ago a
working placement for 200 girls, they got jobs like secretaries, all kinds of
jobs, income for their families and this empowers them. NGOs and us try to change the idea and
traditions of people by awareness regarding women’s roles, there is acceptance
that the female get out and work, life is very difficult so women will continue
working after marriage.”
“We teach life skills, English, sewing, embroidery, but
some projects closed, handicrafts and sewing for two years closed, no funds.
“Now we are going to make a partnership with Actionaid, new project of
psychosocial support and vocational training and small projects. With children
six to twele, at al-Shoka, we do drawing, play psychodrama, individual
counseling, group counseling, home and school visits, family interventions to
fix the relationship between the mother and children. For low achieving children, there are many
success stories in al-Shoka area.”
“Domestic violence, it is a huge problem. Wefaq works on
this, in alliance, for combat violence against women. The procedures we follow, first awareness for
the woman about her rights, about gender, the violence and types of violence.
We consider this as part of protection for women. Then home visits for intervention, talks to
men, awareness, the same awareness to the men. We do community mediation,
separate from the mosque, with mukhtars,
leaders, university teachers, social workers, political activists. It is part
of changing the tradition of the society towards women’s issues; we encourage
women to get independent economically (sewing and handicrafts) especially those
who are exposed to violence. Who has the income has the [power of] decision,
this is a very effective intervention.”
“We still have problem of early marriage, 13 and up,
especially in a bad economy. Previously we start to modify their attitude, but
now tradition to make the girl get married early because of economic bad
situation. They returned to the idea to get rid of her, the older man has
multiple wives.” There have also been
issues of brothers-in-law killing their dead brother’s wives because of money,
because of inheritance. “We are implementing legal protection, victims of legal
violence, about inheritance, alimony, in divorce. It is a tyrant’s law. I have three children,
divorced, have not seen them for two days, [tears again]. One-and-a-half years ago they were taken by
force, I raised them for ten years, I still have my daughter, but they may take
her in a few months.” More tears. So
this is woman who is very aware of her rights and her children’s legal rights,
she has the support of Wefaz, she has a lawyer, and still her husband has
married another woman and has custody of two of their three children. “We are
struggling for these rights. All of us
are victims, suffering from one aspect or another, all women in Gaza.”
Another woman is tapping her fingers on the desk. “We should lead the victim’s movements to
help ourselves and to help others.” I
ask if there are safe houses for women and learn that an attempt was made, but
the government refused. “The Hamas government, of course they took my
children.” We learn that in the past, on occasion, “we refer to Arabs’ safe
home in Arab homes in ’48 Israel, to get safe. Now this cannot happen, the
border is closed. Hamas and Israel occupation are here and there.”
The center teaches health workshops, “we have health
workshop weekly, about burns, about hygiene, but we need a whole program about
women’s health.” I give them an Arabic version of Our Bodies Ourselves, sharing my world with theirs. “Why
shouldn’t we as females make a committee for worldwide peace? We will make a
strategic plan to stop war. Arab women
should work on this idea; the biggest loser is the females.”
The electricity is still off and I discover that some of
the more religious women fast on Mondays and Thursdays. “We get up to wash or iron at 5 am if there
is electricity, maybe 12 hours per day, on and off. Once I come to work, electricity in my house
is on, when I back to home, no electricity.
We don’t feel we are alive. We
have tyrant husbands, they do not cook, wash clothes; they are not ready to
help. How will that change here, how to
change the culture and attitude? But it is very difficult, women’s work is
first step. Of course, the main aim of ours is work. We work hard on gender
issue to change the ideas of people and attitude, men a little change, but they
are moody in this aspect, not convinced.” I joke that I have heard that men
always have PMS and one woman responds, “PMS on a 40 year cycle! May Allah take
all men!” The laughter is slightly relief, slightly conspiratorial, slightly
guilty.
One woman explains, “I have a terrible story. About twelve
years ago I separated from my husband but we stay in the same house, [different
bedrooms] just to make a name that I have a husband. In our society, he has no
responsibility towards his kids, his house, about money, nothing.”
I ask, how do you help your sons to be different from their
fathers? “We are strong women. I suffered with my older son, but he start to
be older and wiser and he at university.
His father’s behavior made a weakness in his personality, but I
intervened, I support him to get stronger and more responsible. Now he is a
responsible person. We established this organization for ourselves and our daughters….
and our sons.”
“Daily we meet with about 10 to 12 cases of women victims
and provide them with help.” One of the
staff is a psychologist and she feels her problems are small compared to
others. “Occupation circumstances make
us stronger, still hard. But I have had enough of getting stronger! I am
satisfied, fed up. We wish you stand by
us, this session is good even if it opened wounds; this society helps
vulnerable women.”
I ask if guns are prevalent in domestic violence cases? “No
guns, but other material for killing, honor killing, related to virginity, are
poisoned or with a knife. These are rare
cases, men do get punished if government knows. But Hamas, don’t punish
properly, may put him in jail, but are not changing attitudes.” Two younger men come in, they are the
accountants and their relationship with the women is friendly, joking
around. These women clearly enjoy the
company of these men, but find the oppressive men in their lives unacceptable.
I turn to the woman who is worried she will lose her
daughter post-divorce. She says she has
“a fun life with my daughter, take her to playground, to restaurants,
massage. My daughter misses her
brothers, she is confused; what can I do? Try to make her not to think about
the explosion in the future if she goes to him [the ex-husband]. He has another tyrant wife.”
“University trained women are desirable because they can
contribute to economy in the marriage. Women are used for their money, we are
cheating ourselves to say okay [with this]. We are sometimes part of the problem; domestic
awareness is a complicated matter.
Mostly, when a woman marries, goes to husband’s family. Independent ones
have apartment, no cultural problem with this.
But economic circumstances prevent this. The mother-in-law is practicing
violence against who, women practice violence against women. It is about
emotions, feelings of the mother that this new woman took her son, a kind of
reflection of her inside emotions that this female came and took the son. The young wife is in competition if her
emotions get extremely jealous, this is another issue. Once it is normal for a
mother to be jealous of the new bride, sometimes the new wife of the son
herself practice violence against the mother-in-law. This is all related to
awareness and balance, raising the awareness about domestic violence, gender
awareness, how to develop attitudes towards gender and campaigns and community
mediation. None of this is taught in
schools, I want to do this, amongst teachers and families, secondary schools,
girls and boys, there are a lot of ideas for services, but no funds. We don’t
even have electricity. I am very tired,
I have many ideas to develop the community but no funds.”
Talk turns to politics.
“America is the father or mother of Israel but we do not talk about
people, we share you in your agonies, it is all about the government.” Then I
was asked a most amazing but understandable question: “Is Congress all Jewish?”
I launch into a description of the Israel Lobby, AIPAC, Christian Zionists and
a quick rundown on how the US system works.
I am amazed to discover that the women have heard about Jewish Voice for
Peace but they are unaware of the Palestinian call for boycott, divestment, and
sanction of Israel.
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